BUSINESS ABOVE THE FOLD
Stocks Hit Record Highs as Tech Keeps the Lights On
Wall Street came out swinging August 8, with the Nasdaq and S&P 500 both hitting new highs as traders decided tariffs were last week’s problem. Silicon Valley’s still carrying the band, even if the drummer (the rest of the economy) keeps missing the beat.
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Small Business Sales Rise (Barely) in July
The U.S. Chamber’s latest snapshot shows a 1% bump in July sales and a 3.6% jump year-over-year. Not enough to throw a parade, but enough to grab the good coffee instead of the gas-station one.
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Tariffs Keep Small Businesses Guessing — and Passing It On
As supplier costs soar up to 30%, small-town owners are reluctantly raising prices just to stay in the game. The middleman is tired, and so is his calculator.
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Manufacturing Orders Slip — Factories Whisper “Uh-Oh”
A regional Fed survey shows new orders sliding into the red for the first time in months. No one’s panicking yet, but the hum of machinery sounds a little nervous.
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Altice USA Takes a Dive After Earnings Miss
The cable company’s stock dropped 8% after posting a bigger-than-expected loss. Even cord-cutters felt a little bad — but not bad enough to plug anything back in.
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A MULLET BIGGER THAN THE BEATLES
That’s the type of mullet that could prop up a jukebox.
PARTY BELOW THE FOLD
Deftones Drop “Milk of the Madonna” Ahead of New Album
The alt-metal veterans just released their first single off Private Music, a moody, heavy slice of atmosphere that sounds exactly like 2003 — in the best possible way. It’s brooding, loud, and perfect for late-night drives that end at Taco Bell.
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Pinkshift’s Double-Single Brings Back That Basement-Show Energy
The Baltimore punks dropped “Don’t Fight” and “Reflection” while announcing their fall tour. It’s the kind of release that makes you want to dust off your Converse and pretend you’re 22 again.
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The Mullet Times — Legitimate Headlines. Dubious Hairlines.